Tips for Picking Bridesmaids (And Saving Your Sanity)

I've always been the gal with a limited amount of close friends. So, for me, picking bridesmaids for my wedding day was a pretty easy decision. I chose the people that are closest to me and who I love dearly -- my sister, my pal from Chicago, and my niece. I share a different bond with each of them and it's so nice that they all get along together.

But I also know that picking bridesmaids isn't that easy for everyone in the world. Sometimes you have 23 close friends. Sometimes you have 3 sisters and another 7 gals that are like sisters since you've known them since 2nd grade. Or your hubby has a list of ladies he'd like you to have in your wedding party. It can get downright difficult and even a little dramatic in some cases.

So here are a few tips to save your sanity when picking bridesmaids.

Don't play the political game.

It's important to remember what (and who) the day is about. At the end of the day it's your choice on who is in your bridal party and you need to make sure you're happy with your decision.

Don't pick people based on superficial reasons.

I will just say it -- those brides who pick people based on who will look nice in pictures are bat shit crazy. Likewise, the gals who pick based on who won't outshine them are equally nuts. Pick people based on love and friendship because that's what you'll really remember.

Don't make people feel left out.

Yes, ultimately it's your decision and your day, but try to be gentle and find a way to let people know they mean the world to you. There are so many things you'll need help with on the day of. Have a friend do a reading or sing. They can attend to the guestbook or usher. They can even officiate. Trust me, you can easily make room for everyone on your big day.

Don't make it a competition.

Picking bridesmaids isn't a chance to see who can outdo who. It also isn't your opportunity to have anyone prove how much they really like you.

It's an honor for everyone involved.

People often seem to have this idea that someone is fortunate to be picked as a bridesmaid. And while that's mostly true, it's also an honor for the bride that the person accepted. I feel honored that the gals I chose wanted to stand up with me when I marry Mr. T.  And I won't ever forget that.