I've officially finished week 21 and 22 of my healthy life. And, honestly, things have been kind of weird. That's partially why I didn't write anything last week -- I didn't really feel like I had anything to say.
I'm not really sure why it's been weird. I guess I just feel like I'm at a standstill. I feel like I'm stuck at the weight I'm at and I feel like there's nothing really new happening.
And I know this happens - being stuck at a weight. I've been down this road before. Eventually everything kind of catches up so it's not as easy to drop the pounds. I'm also getting comfortable with this lifestyle so it doesn't feel like such a big thing anymore.
So I guess the point I'm at is both good and bad. And I keep reminding myself that it's not just about the number on the scale.
I do know that I need to jump start things again. Mr. T and I are going to start working out again next week. Well, as long as we can get this home gym together. We've seriously been in limbo with that since October. And his allergy/asthma stuff is so much better (it's not harvest time and docs are AMAZING). So I definitely think that will help.
We also had a big test this past weekend after we maybe had a little too much bourbon. It totally started innocently, with just a couple of drinks and a movie and Mr. T even saying "we aren't going to get drunk." Then next thing you know it was 2am and we were in fact very, very drunk. Married people can be cool sometimes.
I was super proud of us because normally I drunk snack like a mad woman. But we just had our usual evening snack and then some crackers.
But then Sunday. Oh the horror. I had all of the junk food cravings. I wanted Coke and chips and dip and cookies and fries and tacos and pizza and I don't even know. We settled on being a little bad and ordering some food from a restaurant.
I don't feel totally guilty, I could have been worse. But I more feel bad that we spent money on food that simply isn't worth it to me, I didn't enjoy the food as much as I wanted (it's more the restaurant than anything. It's hard to get great food around here). And I just honestly feel that if I'm going to waste money and calories I should be totally happy with my choice. So I think I'll keep that in mind next time around.
I've also realized that I need to have better options for dinner sometimes. I meal plan. And I do it well. But I've human and sometimes shit happens (because life) and dinner gets ruined. Mr. T and I fight or I forget an ingredient or I'm just busy in my shop and need to work later than I thought. I've found that there aren't a lot of options that fit with the way we want to eat -- we only like to eat out a few times a month and we're trying to cut out processed foods. It's super frustrating and sometimes it makes me just want to throw in the towel.
So I've decided that I need to be better at making some things that I can freeze so I can throw them in the oven when shit hits the fan.
So I guess my lessons for the past couple of weeks is that I need to be a bit more prepared. I think it's so easy for the slightest little thing to throw you off and make you want to quit. But I'm determined to do this. I've also learned that I can roll with the punches. I can do this. I mean, I haven't given up yet, right?