S#@t My Husband Says: I Know Your Belly Jiggles

Photo Credit: Charles Pluta (Flickr) So I realized as I was writing this post that I can no longer call it S#@t My Fiance Says because, well, I no longer have a fiance. I have a husband now (eek!).  That was probably poor planning on my part, but forgive me. Please?

Anyway, here's the latest edition of S#@t My Fiance Husband Says. Because, oh the things my husband says.

Disclaimer: I'm fully aware that Mr. T and I look like children in this post. I guess that's what married people do. I am also aware that I'm posting about big bellies.

The other night Mr. T and I were brushing our teeth before bed. We often brush  our teeth together. I'm not sure why, but it's always been our thing and I think there has only been a handful of times when we haven't done it. I guess that's why the whole his and her sinks thing is important (we don't have his and hers sinks. In NYC, you're lucky to even have a sink in your bathroom). So we were brushing and this conversation commenced.

I poked his belly a little.

Me: "Your belly is hard, why is that? I don't get it. My belly isn't hard. It jiggles."

Mr. T: "I don't know."

Me (as I hit his belly again): "See it's hard. There is no jiggling. Why is it like that? Look, my belly isn't hard, it jiggles. See, watch."

Mr. T (before I even attempt to start jiggling my belly, as if he is certain what's about to happen because he's already noticed it a million times): "I know."

Me: No actual comment, just a gasp and a look of shock.

Seriously, s#@t my husband says.

S#@t My Fiance Says: I'm Worried He Can't Read

A while back, Mr. T went to get some lunch for us from Subway. This would be the day after we fought about what to have for lunch (yeah, apparently what's what we do now). I wrote exactly what I wanted on a piece of paper.