I Am Moving and I Have No Idea Where
I mentioned before that Mr. T and I are moving out of Brooklyn. And I've decided to write about some of the things we're experiencing. I also promise to write a post at some point about all of the reasons we decided to move, but I wanted to talk about moving in general first. Mostly because I'm feeling a little anxious. Moving is stressful. Especially when you're moving to a totally new place.
This isn't the first time I've moved to a new place. I've done it before. When I was in college, I moved to Indianapolis. Then, four years or so later I moved to Chicago. And, then, almost five years later I made my move to NYC. Now, four years later I am moving again. I often joke that I've formed some sort of weird pattern.
It's a bit easier this time since I'm not moving alone. But that doesn't mean I'm freaking out. And this time is a bit different because Mr. T and I have no idea where were actually moving (yet).
I know that sounds incredibly weird. And I wish I could tell you that we are those cool hippie people that just don't care and want to move where we feel like moving. But that's not it at all. I mean, he could probably do that, but my anal planning self would be a total wreck. Mr. T is finishing up his smart kid PhD and we've decided our time in NYC has come to and end. We know we want a place that's cheaper than NYC (which is pretty much everywhere) and we want to be no more than about five to six hours from our family. Our target is the Midwest since that's where are families are so we have some target cities, but it all depends on jobs and such. So right now things are a little up in the air.
And, honestly, thats the most frightening. Most people would probably be excited at the thought of a new adventure, but I'm a planner. I want to be looking at houses and apartments and moving trucks. I want to think about cost of living and what kind of car we should buy. And where is the closest target and chipotle (lord please let us move near a chipotle). I want to look up things on our new little town and figure out all the fun things that we'll be able to do. I want to be mentally planning where we'll put our furniture and how to decorate out new space. I just want to plan something damn it.
But I can't. It's hard. It's annoying. It's frustrating. And I find myself worrying about everything. My most recent melt down was about finding a place. How will we find a place? How will we look for places? How will we know what the neighborhood is like? How will we.....
At times I haven't been very good at dealing with it, but at other times I think I'm good (at least as good as a planner who can't make a plan can be). And Mr. T is doing his best to assure me that we'll be fine (so is my mom. I swear they are the same person). But, like I said, it's hard. Really hard.
So here are some of the things I'm working on doing to keep me sane.
1. Fueling my energy into other projects
In reality, the end of July is some time away so I have time to stress and worry. Right now I am being crafty, working on the blog and shop, and just doing anything I can to not think about all of the things that could freak me out.
2. Letting myself melt down occasionally
This is scary. There's no doubt about that. So it's perfectly acceptable to have a little cry or scream and melt down here and there. It is not OK to melt down about all of the things you have to clean out and try to lecture your husband (and yourself) when you've decided to go to bed early and watch The King of Queens and snuggle.
3. Next month I will start working on the things I can to prepare for the move
Mr. T and I (well, mostly Mr. T) have a lot of stuff. There's tons of cleaning out that needs to happen. That's stuff that needs to happen no matter where we move so I can start working on my closet and under the bed and so on.
4. Write about it
I'm hoping that writing about it on the blog will help me to realize that this everything will be fine. Writing has always helped me. It's one of the reasons I started writing in the first place. Maybe it will even help me to find some humor in it all.
5. Think about all the other moves in my life
Even though I've always known where I'm moving, there have been plenty of unknowns about my past moves. When I moved to Brooklyn, I hadn't even actually seen my apartment. I only saw a few pictures. I also hadn't met my roommate. I only knew her through mutual friends, Facebook, and emails. And, well, all of that worked out pretty well. So maybe this will too.
6. Lean on the sane people
When all of the above doesn't work, I'm going to to lean on the sane people in my life. The people who are normal and see this as what you have to deal with in life. The people who don't freak out. The people who are not me.